The Official Website of Dave Charlie

Any time my balls start to shrink up into my body and turn into a vagina, I ask myself WWHSTD?

Well, I just bought a leather jacket in Florence, I am officially a total rebel now.

Ya know, Beyoncé doesn’t really do it for me……just fucking with you!! I mean she’s gorgeous, come on, you’d have to be gay not to want to bang her. Or extremely racist possibly. Or suffering from dementia. Or a eunuch. There’s probably a few more extenuating circumstances, but I don’t have all day. Actually I do, I’m not doing shit today. I really am just a lazy sack of crap. But regardless, no more brainstorming of extenuating circumstances for not wanting to bang Beyoncé. Is anyone still reading this? Haha, I almost feel bad for you. Almost.

The definition of the word “professional” means you’re getting paid to do whatever it is that you’re doing. A professional athlete, a professional singer, a professional sculptor etc. But there is no stipulation on a minimum amount of money you need to make in order to be “professional.” Ergo, in light of the fact that I have made a grand total of 63 dollars off my book, I am officially a professional writer. Some people call me a dreamer