The Official Website of Dave Charlie

Don’t look a gift mouth in the horse. Just accept that mouth regardless of how it looks.

Oh man, I’m super tired, I’m gonna sleep like a dead baby tonight.

Yep, life is beautiful, just like your genitals.

Sassy turns into bitchy in approximately three make out sessions or one blow job, whichever comes first.

I suck at LIFE. I don’t even really know how to play.

Trust me

“Crack” doesn’t fit, I’m out of ideas.

She used to be a prostitute, but she found Jesus. And then she fucked him!!! But then she apologized, so it’s cool now 🙂

I’m finally ready to settle down. I think she’s the one.

I don’t see a prize at the end of the rope. I see a rope. I also see a fucking lame ass guy with his lame, stupid fucking philosophical metaphors. I also see some self esteem issues.