The Official Website of Dave Charlie

But that’s ok. We all have our shortcomings. Like me personally, I can’t write. Just the other side of the same coin. Coin!! Yep, it’s money!!!! Dance, slave!!

I’m so glad strippers can’t read.

So I was at my buddy’s bachelor party, and one of the strippers said to him, “wow, you’re a really nice guy. I never meet nice guys.” HAHA!!!!! That’s because you’re a stripper. Now I would like you to meet some good friends of mine, they’re super nice, their names are Lincoln, Grant, and Jackson. Now dance.

As I watch my friends get closer and closer to things like marriage and having children, I feel the distance between us growing larger and larger. I think I’m slowing but surely going to drift apart from most of them just due to vastly different lifestyles. I’m talking about quality relationships I’ve had for a decade or more that I’m going to watch dissolve before my eyes. It’s deeply saddening…Whatever, more strippers for me!!! Just kidding, it is very sad. But I do get more strippers. But I’m going to be sad while they rub their silky, toned bodies all over me. Surprise!

I just heard a really disturbing story about a guy who was into necrophilia. Necrophilia!! Seriously??? NECROPHILIA?????!!!! Why can’t you be into golden showers and fisting like a normal person?

One day I’ll run out of materi

Apparently, cunnilingus jokes are in bad taste, I think they taste fine most of the time.

So, Facebook friends, how are you liking this new setup? You don’t like it? You don’t like me? You’re gonna defriend me? Shit, well let’s ask the WordPressers what they think. Hello, blogging community, your trite words and annoying devotion to dead authors is pathetic, now do you think my Facebook friends should defriend me? Be honest.

Forgive me, father, for I have sinned. Dad? Are you there?

Since when are abortion jokes not funny? I think I missed something. Ya know, I was in Europe for awhile, that must be it. Well, you guys are super boring, time to start looking for some new Facebook friends. You guys know anybody?