The Official Website of Dave Charlie

Surprise surprise, your current boyfriend did the same exact shit your last boyfriend did. Ya know, if a lab rat can figure it out, you should be able to as well.

Guys, I’m walking down the aisle today. The candy aisle. Mmmmmm i luv twix

Hanging out with tech people is great, tech people are always on their phones! I fit right in! They don’t have to know that I’m not responding to time sensitive emails and am rather updating my blog 🙂

Who takes the time to write a four paragraph scathing review of a toaster on Amazon? Don’t you have anything better to do? Like update your blog.

I don’t want to toot my own horn or anything, but if I had lived in tsarist Russia, I would have written some killer allegories

“Reach for the sky ’cause tomorrow may never come.” -Social Distortion. You may think they are a lame, untalented band, but that lyric has potency regardless. Does anyone give a shit? No? Story of my life….

Don’t worry, no one’s reading your blog.

You know when you’re a kid and your parents take you to an amusement park and there’s always that one ride you really wanted to go on but there wasn’t enough time and so your parents say something like, “that’ll be the first ride we go on the next time we go, it’ll make you more excited to come back.” That’s Spain for me.

So, I think 27 is the magic age. Guys officially enter the “older guy” realm and can really start to expand their portfolios, and girls’ left hands really start to feel naked. And if you’re a famous musician, you die. I think I should come out ok.

Ice Cube says he’s a “natural born killa.” I didn’t know natural born killaz drank Coors Light. Now I know.