Category Archives: Uncategorized

Awesome.

I used to dislike rap. I used to dislike country. EDM has made me realize the relativity of everything, and I really, really like rap and country now.

I’m having a pretty good time partying with rich kids and their parents’ money.

If you’re a guy and you think you might be bisexual, I want you to explore your sexuality. But it’s not gonna happen with me. If you’re a girl and you think you might be bisexual, I want you to explore your sexuality. And I would love to help out any way I can.

I’m gonna be a great uncle. That was ambiguous. I’m gonna be an excellent uncle.

Hello, I have deep qualms about marriage and I’m pretty damn sure I don’t want to have children, but would you like to hang out just me and you with no contracts or external obligations? If you need to think about it I understand.

“The A students work for the C students & drop outs and the B students teach.”

The problem is when I try to grow a hipster mustache, I just end up looking like an 80s porn star. And people with small children give me funny looks.

I like my women how I like my single malt scotch. Aged 18 years and on ice. —Not really, I just thought it was funny. I don’t really hang out with people who do hard drugs.

If I ever buy a p-coat, please shoot me in the face.