Category Archives: Uncategorized

Ok, did like one girl kinda admit one time that she kinda liked the smell of Axe and so guys just took it, ran with it, and drove it into the fucking ground? WE HAVE A HOLE IN THE OZONE LAYER. Girls aren’t going to want to have sex with you if they have skin cancer.

I wonder what Lori Beth Denberg is up to these days.

Today someone asked me if because you capitalize Catholicism, Judaism, Christianity, Islam, etc, if you’re supposed to capitalize “atheism.” No. You don’t. Unless it’s at the beginning of a sentence. Why not? Because it not a fucking religion. That would be like having an Anarchist party. They’re mutually exclusive concepts.

Jennifer Lawrence is cute, ya know, like the girl next door. If you lived next to a donut factory. If I ever talked to her I think would say every number as a denomination of a baker’s dozen. “How old are you?” “2 baker’s dozen.” “What time is it?” “0.615384615384615 baker’s dozen PM.”

The number of times per week I’m sitting by myself, on my phone, just dying of laughter is probably disturbingly high.

Ok, we had our first fight. It’s ok, it was bound to happen eventually. But we can get through this, and when we do we’ll be stronger than ever. Do you believe in us? I do. I dream of a world where ok I can’t keep this up, even I have my limits.

Who wants to drive me to my lobotomy surgery? They say I shouldn’t really drive right afterward, so I should get dropped off if possible.

Ha, we like to have a good time here, don’t we??

Ok, I was kinda taunting you there. I’m not sorry.

No, I didn’t see what so-and-so posted to Facebook, I don’t go on Facebook and actually look at it, I just post to it. I know how it works and I’m taking advantage of you. And you like it. Or are at least resigned to it.